Whitney Houston: Now With Less Crack!

All y'all people out there saying that Whitney Houston ruined her voice are smoking the crack she left behind. No doubt homegirl ruined her lungs with all that weed and rock cocaine. I heard her on Oprah wheezing like a hyena. But her voice is still there, only deeper.

Cut her some slack y'all. She's going through the change! It used to be the speedballs that made her sweat and now it's hotflashes. But I don't care! I love me some Whitney!!!

I love her more than Bobby Brown loves his pipe!

Here's Whitney's newest video from her comeback album I Look to You; the song is called Million Dollar Bill.

Enjoy the divaliciousness!




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What's Wrong, Whitney?

Can someone tell me why Whitney Houston, who at one time was in fact the greatest singer in the history of the world, looks so sad on the the cover of her big comeback-post-crack-finally-divorced-Bobby-Brown album?

It better not be because the album sucks. Because I love me some Whitney. No jokes, I still break-out The Bodyguard and Preacher's Wife soundtracks every now and then when I want to get my diva on.

All I got to say is, if she wants the album to succeed, she should release this track as a dance mix.

I love you, Whitney. Welcome back. We've all missed you.

Beyonce Has Such A Big Ego!

Good for RuPaul! He's released a new music video. No... wait. You mean that's not a drag queen? That's Beyonce??? My bad. Take two!

Beyonce Knowles a.k.a. Sasha Fierce has released her latest music video Ego!

First let me say, Ego is one of my favorite (non-dance) tracks on the whole album I Am Sasha Fierce. Therefore I have built up ridiculously high standards in my head for the video to live up to. Sadly, it fails to live up to them.

I still LOVE the song, and love me some Beyonce, but the video...."mehhhh."

I get the whole cohesive vibe that she's going after with all the videos being released in black and white, but this video suffers because of it. Instead of looking artsy, it comes off as boring.

And the dancing.... she looks tired as if she threw her back out. Like she said to the director. "Find me a chair and a cane. I gotz to rest a minute."

Add on top of that, Miss Fierce has never looked queenier! And that is saying a LOT! Because, let's face it. Beyonce is basically a draq queen with lady-parts.

Plus, it looks like the recession has hit Beyonce's video budgets. I've seen more expensive youtube videos done in someone's basement.

With all that said, if you've never heard the song, it is definitely worth a listen.

I can't stay mad at you long, Beyonce. But, you better work!

Leah Driscoll is a Rising Diva

I happened across an independent artist that I think you're gonna love. Her name is Leah Driscoll. She's a diva-licious singer with real soul in her voice.

She's new to the music scene, but that doesn't make her any less fabulous. So if you haven't heard of her yet, don't let that stop you from listening.

I'm telling you once I got a hold of her music, I just couldn't turn it off! I literally liked it that much.

The song I posted is called Thief of Love from her album Rising. Give her a listen. Tell me what you think.

If you can't get enough, check out Miss Driscoll's website by clicking HERE or listen to more tracks on her MySpace page. You should also check out Mr. Do Wrong, it's one of my other favorite songs from the album.

You just gotta love a diva!

Katy Perry Has a Bad Case of Hot-o-rexia

International Diva Supreme Katy Perry is one of millions of people in our world that suffer from a horrible disorder I call hot-o-rexia. It's a crippling condition where you look in the mirror, and no matter what is staring back at you, all you see is hotness.

Katz, honey. You are not alone. I'm a sufferer too.




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FYI: Kelly Clarkson is NOT a Lesbian!

I can't tell you how excited I am about Kelly Clarkson's new album!

Breakaway is one of my all time favorite albums in the history of the world. I feel about it the way some people felt about Micheal Jackson's Thriller in the 80's. (But I wouldn't know, because I was just a baby.)

Kelly's "rock" album My December was horrible. I listened to it out of my love for Miss Clarkson nothing else. It was so angry and well... sucky.

Kelly is back to the pop sound that made her famous with her new album All I Ever Wanted. But she still manages to show a little anger with the first track called, My Life Would Suck Without You. It's how an angry non-lesbian says "I love you."

When asked if she is really a closeted lesbo, Miss Independent said,

I get that all the time. People are like, “Are you secretly a lesbian? Because I’d really love it.” Lesbians tell it to me all the time. I’m like, “I’m glad it works for you and I wish I liked women like that because oftentimes men are very hard for me, but I happen to like boys.” I could never be a lesbian. I would never want to date [another woman like] myself, ever. I’m a crazy person. I need some kind of stable, quiet man.

Kelly, I love you. I love you whether you're a lesbo or a loner. I just don't like you when you're mad and screaming instead of singing. Hooray for the return of singing Kelly!!!

Victoria Beckham is a Gay Man in a Diva's Body

As if the world needed one more reason to obsess over Victoria Beckham or her super hot hubby David. Vicky has gone and added another one!

She told the Italian Vanity Fair that she thinks she has a gay man living inside her!

From the looks of it, an anorexic, over-dressed, flamboyant gay man. Wait a minute... was this Victoria way of telling the world she secretly wishes she was me the way I secretly wish I were her?!

“I love women. I like them as friends, as interesting people to speak with. But I love gay men. I always say it. Inside me there is a gay man who wants to come out! With heterosexual men I have nothing in common – excluding my husband, brothers and father, you understand.”

Now to crank up the kinky-factor another notch, here are new pics of her heterosexual husband David Beckham modeling underwear for Armani.

I am so jealous of the gay man trapped inside of Posh right now.

Fantasia Brings the House Down

This is has been a week where the powers-that-be graced us with thrice the American Idol, and I wanted to top off the work week with a former Idol's recent performance. Let's call it Feel Good Friday: Fantasia Edition.

Fantasia is a CBW, and I love me a CBW. (That's Crazy Black Woman.) LOVE THEM! And Fantasia Barrino is one the craziest.

Below is Idol Number Three singing her butt off to Lady Marmalade at a Patti LaBelle tribute concert. Miss Patti, now there's another CBW that I love.

Not so random side note: Did you know Fantasia has seven Grammy nominations? And it's rumored that she has been pegged to play Celie in the film adaptation of The Color Purple the Musical since she did such an awesome job on Broadway. Good for her! Maybe she's not so crazy after all.

Victoria Posh Beckham Markets Panties for Armani

Posh Spice Victoria Beckham was recruited by Armani to pimp their panties for women the way her hubby David Beckham has done for men.

Victoria looks smoking hot! I'm not gonna lie. And I love me some Vicky B.

Homegirl has push three babies out of that body. Can you believe it?

Am I the only one that think the pose is reminiscent of the old Life Line commercial?

Mariah Butchers Her Own Classic

Y'all know I love me some Mariah Carey. I love her so much I'm thinking of getting a Mariah tattoo. Maybe a charm-bracelet around my wrist or a butterfly and unicorn battling to the death stretched across my back. However, I have to tell you, sister-friend has gone Froot Loops! So it's making me think twice about coloring my perfectly porcelain skin with a memorial to her fiercy fierceness.

Homegirl is releasing a new album (which I will totally love no matter what) that is nothing but ballads! But that's not the story here.

Mimi re-recorded her classic Hero as one of the ballads, complete with a craptastic new video and everything!

The video is a bunch of shots of Mariah singing in a studio and outside shots of skyscrapers. The only people in the video are Mimi herself, some black chick I've never seen before who I suppose is the producer, and Jack the Jack Russell Terrier.

So, who exactly is the hero in this video? The producer-lady? Or Jack the dog? No. I propose the song is all about Mariah Carey. Mariah is actually singing to herself about herself because she is her own hero!

In fact, her head is so big nowadays that the headphones will not even fit over her giant, ego-inflated head! She has to listen to them in only one ear at a time.

The whole thing serves to remind us that Mariah, one of the greatest recording artistes of all time, doesn't sing like she used to. Now she has to do that whisper-sing thingy that she always does. Maybe all those dog-whistles she did in the 90's shot her voice. Who knows? But it's sacrilege!

Tell me what you think.


Click HERE if you can't see the video.

This Little Lamb Personifies Fierceness

Y'all know I love me some Beyonce. I also love Beyonce spoofs. I've featured numerous ones here on Pink Sheep.

My BFF and fellow-blogger Chris Illuminati who writes the brilliant blog 9 to Fried sent me this latest spoof of Single Ladies featuring a little girl doing her best Sasha Fierce impression.

The best part is when she does the "punch the floor" move or whatever Beyonce calls that piston thing. And the "I'm a little tea pot" move is another good one.

Beyonce needs to get this girl on the phone. This little diva could teach Miss Knowles a thing or two about diva-ology.

Pure fiercy fierceness.

Happy Birthday, Pink Partner!

Birthday snaps go out to Pink Partner who turns another fabulous (yet undisclosed) year older today! WOOT! I love you, Sugar Bear!

If you ever decide to pack your bags and leave, you will see me grab your ankles and sing this song as you walk out the door... though no where near as good as this amazing little girl from the Philippines. This diva in training diva is named Charice Pempengco. Homegirl can really saaang! Watch her work the crowd and the mic. Fabulosity deluxe! ...but I digress.

Happy Birfday, babe.
Love,
Beej

Fabulosity Overload!

The fiercy fierceness oozing from this photo has left me at a loss for words. Tell me what you think is going through the minds of Brandy Norwood, Patti LaBelle, and Tyra Banks in this pic.

Join the Britney Spears Circus

Yes, yes, yes!!! Praise Jesus! Yes!

Halleluyer! Britney Spears is really and truly, honest to goodness, back! Her album Circus isn't just a one hit wonder. No! It's a goldmine!

Her latest video, the title track Circus, is super-d-duper!

Let me say, I know not everyone likes Britney Spears. But it's hard for me to wrap my brain around someone who is reading this gossip site that doesn't watch her every move. I mean, come on. We live on this stuff.

My BFF Erin P. practically held an all-night candlelight vigil this week waiting for the album to drop on iTunes so she could download it! I'm expecting her to break out the top hat and whip any day now.

Any ways, the video is so full of fiercy fierceness that I think it gave me a rash! It's that good!

The look reminds me of old-school Madonna, mostly because there are all kinds of flames in the background. It also reminds me of old-school Janet Jackson because there is a dance-break in the middle.

If you simply can't get enough Circus you can click HERE to watch Brit-Brit perform it on Good Morning America. Just as awesome as the studio version. I swear.

It's not just her standing there stoned out of her mind while lip syncing! Homegirl brings the HEAT!

Who Dat? I think It's Beyonce

Beyonce Knowles, a.k.a. Sasha Fierce, is the January covergirl of GQ Germany.

She looks like the crazy-eyed love child of Tyra Banks and Lady Gaga.

Beyonce really has the fabulosity to be an enduring lifetime diva. But if she doesn't slow down a bit, her over exposure is gonna cause her to get own my nerves.

What so you, little lambs? Fiercy Fierceness or Acid Reflux?

Katy Perry Is So Controversial

Katy Perry's fabulosity is seeping into uncharted territories. She is one of the most influential gays and lesbians in America... and she's not even gay! She's a straight chick who landed the cover of Out Magazine's Out 100.

This is amazing because:
(1.) she's a chick, and even though Out denies it, the magazine is basically about gay men by gay men, rather than the entire GLBT community.
(2.) She's straight. Self-explanatory.
(3.) She is hated by a lot of people. I adore her, but I know many, many of you find her annoying and/or inflammatory.

Miss Perry has received some major flack for her unique perspective on gaydom. When she came out with her first big single Ur So Gay, the gays got up in arms and thought she was a homophobe. Mostly because she comes from a religious background. So queers assumed she was gay-bashing. In the Out interview, Katy confesses how she wanted to be the "next Amy Grant." Which I totally understand since I fancy myself the "next Tammy Faye Baker."

Then when I Kissed a Girl hit the radio, conservative Christian groups bashed her for not being homophobic enough! How dare she sing about the salacious details of cherry chapstick! Why, I never! *clutching handbag to chest*

Meanwhile Katy has been cashing her fat checks and dancing in the clubs with her main gays. Totally oblivious to what other people have to say about her.

That's why I love you, Katz. You are you, and everyone else can suck it.




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Madonna in the X-mas Spirit

What in God's green earth, and I do mean green earth, is Madonna wearing? She showed up at a big UNICEF charity event this week dressed like this.

Giving to charity puts the Material Divorcee into the X-mas spirit. Kabbalahists take the Christ out of Christmas. Someone should boycott them. Get Focus on the Family on the phone...STAT! But I digress.

Madge is obviously in the X-mas spirit because she came to the event wearing an X-mas tree!

Now, to help you get further into the X-mas spirit, here is a terrifying touching picture of Madonna and child.

As If the Gays Weren't Mad Enough...

Rolling Stone has released their list of the Greatest Singers of All Time. Snaps go to Aretha Franklin, the Queen of Soul, for taking the number one spot.

Notice it is the greatest SINGERS not performers in the world... so sorry, Britney and Madonna. Sucks to be you right now.

Apparently, however, it sucks to be some other people right now too. Barbra Streisand and Celine Dion didn't make the list either. Neither did Cher!

Is this some sort of conspiracy to get the gays to riot in the streets of San Francisco? First Proposition 8 and now this!

Strangely, Michael Jackson made the list. How? I'll never know, because I would put him in the same category as Brit-Brit and Madge.

Where in the heck are all the divas? What kind of crazy homophobic list is this. Was this list put together by a couple of drunk frat buddies? Or Focus on the Family staff members? Whoever made the list clearly hates the gays.

On the plus side, Whitney and Mariah made the list, but it was waaaay down the list.

My BFF Andrea and fellow-blogger Jodi will be glad to know Elvis made the top five. My friend from high school Melissa will be ecstatic that David Bowie snuck on to the list at 23. And my BFF Mom will be glad Janis Joplin came in the top third of the list. With that said, trust me, there are a lot of surprises on the list in regards to the names and the rankings.

Here's Rolling Stone's Top 5:
1. Aretha Franklin
2. Ray Charles
3. Elvis Presley
4. Sam Cooke
5. John Lennon

To protest (and protesting is sooo in right now) I'm making my own list. Here are Pink Sheep of the Family's picks for Top 5 Greatest Singers of All Time! Sorry, boys. No men made my Top 5 list.

5. Mariah Carey. Disagree if you want, but Tommy Mottola knew what he was doing back in the early 90's.



4. Martina McBride. She is the original Carrie Underwood. A true Southern-fried diva.



3. Celine Dion. She's a dork, but homegirl can sing. And Don't act like she can't!



2. Barbra Streisand. She's Barbra freakin' Streisand. Her voice is like butta'.




1. Whitney Houston. Nobody could touch pre-crack Whitney. Nobody! She was in a league all by herself.



So tell me, little lambs. Who would top your list? Remember SINGERS not performers. So, no one better say Jessica Simpson or Kanye West!

Don't limit yourself to just living singers either, Rolling Stone didn't.

Click HERE for the entire list.

Worst Weave Ever: Beyonce Edition

Beyonce Knowles performed at the World Music Awards in Monte Carlo, Monaco this weekend looking like this!

Sasha isn't looking so fierce, if you know what I'm saying. Her weave looks like it's stuck on with velcro.

Poor little lamb is having an identity crisis. Since changing her name to Sasha Fierce, I don't think she's had a chance to change the name on her American Express card yet.

Can you image Beyonce Sasha walking up to the counter at BeautyCo and the cashier telling her, "This aint you!" and then declining her card and sending her away. That explains why she bought some Hannah Montana extensions from the Halloween clearance aisle at the Dollar Store and hot glued them to her head.

Not fierce.

Speaking of dual identities. There are rumors that homegirl wants to play Wonder Woman in an upcoming movie. Which I think would be totally hot! Because under normal circumstances I love me some Beyonce.

So maybe it's all to get a movie part. Instead of carrying the lasso of truth on her belt, she'll just detach one of her extensions and snag the bad guy.

All Eyes Are On Katy Perry

International superstar and diva supreme Katy Perry can practically do no wrong... practically. Even superstars have a dim moment every now and then.

Miss Perry showed up to the MTV Europe Awards wearing this monstrosity. And yes, those are eyes on her boobs!

Others have said the dress makes her look pregs, fueling rumors of a Katy Perry and Travis McCoy hybrid.

I'm not sure it makes her look pregnant as much as it makes her look dumb. Why, Katy? Why?

Oh what am I saying? I can't stay mad at you, Katz. Your fabulosity is drawing me in and causing me to over look this small fashion infraction.

However, I still feel sorry for the muppet that lost its life to make that dress.




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